Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Three Simple Questions

I think there are three deceptively simply questions in life:

  1. Who am I?
  2. How do I know?
  3. What am I supposed to do about it?

I think Mormonism has a unique take on the answers to these questions. My believing self answers these questions like this:

  1. Who am I?  I am a child of God.
  2. How do I know?  Because the key of knowledge has been restored through prophets who cannot lead us astray.
  3. What am I supposed to do about it?  Follow the prophet.  see (2).

Yet these three questions are much larger in scope than the simple LDS reflexive answers can provide.  As our faith matures, we realize the need for greater clarity:

1. Who am I?



By itself, our simplified Mormon identity as Children of God gives us no sense of unique identity --
all humans on this earth are equally children of God.  So what does it really mean? What is the nature of being co-eternal with god as his spirit-intelligence children?  What is the nature of God's being, if he was once like us and we are to become like him?  Where is Heavenly Mother in all this?  Is gender and our family identity persistent in both directions?

The Who am I question points us to a "First Principle" in both the metaphysical discipline of philosophy as well as religion:
Ontology: What is the nature of being?  
Mormonism does offer a unique ontology, although poorly explained in the correlated materials.  This ontology is best expressed in Lorenzo Snow's couplet, "As man is, God once was, and as God is, man may become".  We are divine beings on a divine journey.  Although Joseph and Brigham speculated on what this means - and often created confusion as a result -- we have a divine nature, origin, and destiny.

This fundamentally must change how we view others.  "God" is not some being beyond being, but rather, "God" is exalted humanity.  We ought to really explore how that affects our daily walk.  When we embrace who Jesus Christ truly is -- as both god and man, and yet, one of us and our Friend, then we must embrace that Jesus, the I AM, is the key to life itself.

Once we realize the Christ, this concept of being is not just about who am I, but also, who are you, who is Christ, and how do we connect to each other in love.  Life is about this connection.  Christ's first, second, greatest, last, and new commandment was to love one another as he loves us. This is what it means to have life in abundance.

2. How do I know?


When we look in detail at prophetic answers, not only is there insufficient knowledge within the words of the prophets, but we observe how inconsistent they are from the beginning. Prophets today are not prophetic, but rather, in the position of authority -- the only ones authorized to pronounce doctrine, yet they are neither scholars, scientists, nor particularly imbued with prophetic visions.  Thus, our reliance on their words as trumping science and independent investigation seems antithetical toward truth-seeking.

The "How do I know" question points us to another "First Principle" in both metaphysics as well as the gospel:
Epistemology: What is the nature of knowledge?
Mormonism offers five important epistemological concepts:

  1. Truth is knowledge of things as they are, as they were, and as they are to come. 
  2. All truth is circumscribed into one great whole.  That is to say that science as knowledge of the material/physical world, and religion as a kind of faith knowledge need not be opposed, but in fact, should harmonize -- not by relegating science to a second seat, but rather, by using the right tools for the right purpose.
  3. While eternal truth may be unchanging and without question, mankind's understanding of such truths is limited to our ability to understand.  We receive revelation through our minds and hearts in the language of our understanding.  
  4. We learn truth line upon line, precept upon precept, thus our understanding of truths must be both progressive and evolutionary.
  5. We learn through our own experience and not by dogma and creed.  Alma 32 teaches an epistemic approach that allows us to work in faith to gain knowledge by experimentation.  

In our faith, we ought never to be afraid of the truth, nor in any way cover up inconvenient facts of our past and doctrine because they are not "faith promoting".  According to Alma, faith is not knowledge, but rather, hope in something that is true -- or at least "not false".  To believe something that is false in not faith, but rather deception, and ultimately will cause faith crisis.  As disciples of a God of Truth, we must be rigorously honest in our approach to learning truth.

3. What am I to do?


Mormon authority requires absolute, unquestioning obedience and uncompromising loyalty to the brethren and church in all things.  (see GBH: "Loyalty" 2003).  The basic principle is (1) the Love of God is the first and greatest commandment, (2) If we love god we keep his commandments, and (3) his commandments are expressed through the voice of his anointed servants -- the prophets, seers, and revelators.  All of Mormonism, today, can be reduced this simple principle: you love god by obeying the brethren with exactness.

Yet this kind of obedience does not save us, does not develop us, but rather destroys us by virtue of making us vulnerable to despotism and demagoguery.  This is not the Plan of God, but rather, the one who required absolute obedience. We really need a much better way to sort out what we are to do.

The "What am I to do" question leads us to a third "First Principle" in both metaphysics as well as the gospel:
Ethics: How are we to act?
Our religion has many ethical and moral standards, yet they are most often focused on separating our behavior from others in the world.  We do not have a strong, simple moral ethic that guides our living, other than "obedience" to the dictates of our Church leaders. We have created a kind of Mosaic/Rabbinical/Talmudic law unto ourselves.

Yet Christ had a much simpler concept: to love one another as he loves us.  And how does he love us?
 he forgives, he is our friend, he is unconditional in his love.  Others have said as much: Confucius, Hillel, and almost every ethical system in the world: "That which we find hateful when done to us, we should not do to others."  Or positively said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

Jesus, and Hillel, correctly claimed that this simple principle is the basis of all the law and the prophets. It ought to be the basis of how we act, and how we thoughtfully hearken to those who sit in Moses' prophetic seat.

Our Mormon ethic clarifies this kind of love in a way we ought to take very seriously: We are to lift one another's burdens, that they may be light, to mourn with those who mourn, and to comfort those who stand in need of comfort.  We witness in Mormonism of a godly love when we serve without reservation our communities.  I have seen this miracle of Mormon service -- we can make a difference by being Mormon in the Way Alma taught at the Waters of Mormon.

So,

Who am I?
How do I know?
What am I to do about it?

Jesus answers our questions by saying, "I AM the Way, the Truth, and the Life".

Who am I?  I AM, and in being One with Christ, I have Life in abundance.

How do I know?  Because I am here to learn through my own experience -- I will make mistakes, but as I test, doubt, and discover, the truth will become clear to our minds through objective, empirical experiments, and to our hearts, through our hope, faith, and love.

What am I to do about it?  As the first disciples called themselves "Followers of the Way", we follow not men and their opinions, but rather, Christ in his words -- the basis of all ethical systems: to love one another as he loves us.

How Man Creates God in his Own Image

"In the beginning, man created god in his own image, in the image of man, created he him.  Father and Son, created he them."
(Genesis 1:27, "translated" by my seer stone).

If I were to quote this in a church meeting, or with any Christian, Muslim, or Jew, I might as well be (seer) stoned indeed, either literally, figuratively, or otherwise.

Such blasphemy. Or is it?

Does the idea really seem strange that mankind created a definition of god that looks suspiciously like what mankind thinks is a powerful being?  Mankind deferred to kings and despots, so the old testament definition of god is despotic.  Mankind saw that kings and despots conduct genocide, so their god condoned genocide, slavery, polygamy, and all sorts of pretty awful things.

Observe, for a moment, how in the LDS Church, we have a real person, Joseph Smith, who did a number of things, both good and bad.  Yet, when Mormons sing, "Praise to the Man", we have an image of Joseph Smith that hardly corresponds to the reality of the man.  He has become mythologized, to something beyond anything he actually was.  "Joseph Smith, the Prophet and Seer of the Lord, has done more, save Jesus only, for the salvation of men in this world, than any other man that ever lived in it."

Our LDS family and friends revere Thomas S. Monson as the Prophet, Seer and Revelator, and in recent weeks, the announcement that he is no longer actively involved in church leadership has been met with sadness for how much we will miss his leadership.  I'm sorry, but I don't see it: within months of him taking charge of the Church, he triggered the Proposition 8 campaign, and since then, has done nothing but pursue one ill-conceived political escapade against marriage equality after another.

Yet my point isn't to criticize either Joseph Smith or Thomas S. Monson.  The reality is that they are human, no more and no less, yet in our culture, we make them more than they really are.

Is it so surprising, then, that we would create god in our own image?

Let's suggest a hypothesis: there is a god.  How would we know this?  How could we be sure that whatever we think is god, who revealed himself to ancient prophets who then attempted to kill their son, or conduct genocide, or who called for the sun to stop moving around the earth so that the israelites could slaughter their enemies -- all that -- how would we know that this "god" is the real "god" and not some demiurge -- a subordinate god who has taken over the earth?  How would we know what God's actual attributes are?  That this same demiurge told us so?

You see the problem here.  Human nature creates explanations to fill in the gaps of understanding. We mythologize historical figures to make them heros -- more than they really were.  We create an image of god in the place of what was a real person, perhaps.

Take Jesus Christ.  Another hypothesis: he was a real person who may have taught that he was the Son of God.  Again, not something I can ever prove -- but I think it's a good working hypothesis.

What on earth did Jesus mean?  What if Jesus, being somehow taught by "wise men from the east", came to a realization that God was not a being "out there", but as many Zoroastrians, Taoists, and Hindus believe, is a real presence within us all?  Jesus did live, after all, in a town that likely was a way station along the Silk Road of his time, where such travelers would have been common.

What if the real teaching Jesus taught was that (1) God is far more real and present than our idolatrous image of god in scripture can ever be, and (2) that mankind indeed shares a common heritage with god?

What if the real teaching from Joseph Smith is (1) God of the creeds -- that of an omnipotent, omnibenevolent, omniscient, and omnipresent being -- is a logical impossibility and an abomination, and those who profess such nonsense are indeed corrupted by a false idea of god, and (2) Mankind indeed shares a common heritage with god?

I note that Jesus condemned Pharisees in the way they had created in the Law something that wasn't there -- the rabbinical/Talmudic interpretation of the Torah was so expanded, distorted, and changed from the original message of godly love that it became an idol to worship.  The rabbis had created a law -- and a god -- in their own idolatrous image.

I note how Mormon culture, cultivated by our idolatrous worship of leaders, has created a culture of obedience to every word uttered by the anointed general authorities.  We worship an idol -- and call that idol Christ.

This leads me to realize, that not only "in the beginning" did man create god, but even today, we continue to create god in our own hateful, despotic image.

Yet in spite of this, I see hope.  Deeply spiritual hope.  Woven in our scriptures and narrative are principles that can transform our dialog and remove the sin of idolatry from us.

  • We can anchor to the singular idea that our spiritual intelligence is co-eternal with god
  • We can realize that god is not "out there" as a distinct kind of being, but rather, that God is exalted humanity.
  • We can embrace that eternal life is not some future state, but rather, as Dieter Uchtdorf has taught, we are in the glorious middle of our eternal lives -- eternity is always found in the Middle.
  • We can realize that our faith is made real by practicing love -- unconditional, abiding, perfect love, one for another.

While I no longer believe in the God of creedal Christianity, that of an omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent being who exists outside of being -- to me it this being is a logical impossibility and a monster in the presence of random evil.  I have come to know, personally, a god within me, who weeps with me, and listens to me as I struggle through this existence.  And I have seen how this same presence is expressed when we are exalted humans -- able to love and serve one another here, now, in this life, in love.

And when I embrace this god, i start to realize that my image transforms, god creates me in his or her own image, and as i peer into the eyes and soul of my brothers and sisters, i see the very image -- the face -- of god.

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

On The Priesthood as a Male Dominance Hierarchy

I am coming to the conclusion that the foremost paradigm and purpose of the LDS Church is to establish an authoritarian male dominance hierarchy, and to require members' absolute obedience to this authority.  I believe we need to set aside such authoritarian hierarchy if we are to truly love one another as Jesus has loved us.

Can we practice unconditional, egalitarian Love a Church that seems to thrive on authoritarian control over our lives?  Yes, I believe we can. But we need to explore what "The Priesthood" is and how it affects what we do in our culture.

In the natural world, a "dominance hierarchy" is social order among some kinds of animals, where the group is ordered hierarchically under a single, primary leader or set of leaders. Some animal groups have an "alpha male" leader, to whom all other males defer, and who controls the reproductive rights of the group. While some of these orders are focused on only one alpha, in more complex hierarchies, there is a kind of linear hierarchy, where each individual in the pack is either dominant or submissive to another individual in the group.  There are no true 'equals'.

In the "male dominance hierarchy", the males adopt the right of dominion, and females are subordinate to males.  Most natural male dominance hierarchies are polygynous in nature -- the higher up the male is in the hierarchy, the more females he possesses for breeding purposes.

Consider the following material from Abraham chapter 3:
"If two things exist, and there be one above the other, there shall be greater things above them; ... Now, if there be two things, one above the other, and the moon be above the earth, then it may be that a planet or a star may exist above it; Howbeit that he made the greater star; as, also, if there be two spirits, and one shall be more intelligent than the other, yet these two spirits, notwithstanding one is more intelligent than the other, have no beginning; they existed before, they shall have no end, they shall exist after, for they are gnolaum, or eternal.
"And the Lord said unto me: These two facts do exist, that there are two spirits, one being more intelligent than the other; there shall be another more intelligent than they; I am the Lord thy God, I am more intelligent than they all."
(Abraham 3:16-19)
These words perfectly describe a dominance hierarchy in the form of a *linear ranking system*, where each spirit -- that is each of us -- is recognized as either dominant or submissive relative to every other member, creating a linear distribution of rank. Whenever two of us are together, one is dominant, one is subordinate in terms of "intelligence".  And in this case, the use of the term "intelligence" refers to the eternal value and worth/worthiness of the individual.

You may well say, at this point, that such distinction is not part of the gospel, for in Section 78, Joseph Smith, introducing the concepts of the United Order and consecration, describes the goal of being equal in both earthly and heavenly things.

Yes, we can say that all Mormons are equal.  It's just that some are more equal than others; and in fact, hierarchy pervades everything we do and are in the Church, and our one purpose is to support the hierarchy through our absolute obedience.

Consider a bit more of what is said in Abraham 3:
"Now the Lord had shown unto me, Abraham, the intelligences that were organized before the world was; and among all these there were many of the noble and great ones; And God saw these souls that they were good, and he stood in the midst of them, and he said: These I will make my rulers; for he stood among those that were spirits, and he saw that they were good; and he said unto me: Abraham, thou art one of them; thou wast chosen before thou wast born.
"And there stood one among them that was like unto God, and he said unto those who were with him: We will go down, for there is space there, and we will take of these materials, and we will make an earth whereon these may dwell;  And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them;"
(Abraham 3:22-25)
I don't think it is at all a stretch to observe that the LDS church, with respect to its priesthood, is strictly hierarchical.  Indeed, our English word "hierarchy" derives from the Greek term for "high priest"/"Hierarch", so priesthood is by very nature a hierarchy.

But there are three troubling elements here:

  1. There is a strict elitism in these verses in Abraham.  Those who lead were designated to do so from before this world -- there is nothing you or I can do about this.  This elitism has justified the ban on giving the priesthood to blacks, as well as fostering a kind of familial patronage/nepotism among LDS leadership.  Most LDS leaders are part of an elite group of Mormons who share common ancestry.  The rest of us are subordinate.
  2. Our purpose in life, exclusively, is to OBEY -- to prove that we will do what we are commanded. According to Abraham 3:25, life is not about learning or development, but rather, is the final test to see if we will obey.  Full stop.
  3. When we combine this strict hierarchy with D&C sections 131 and 132, observing the practice by Brigham Young and Joseph Smith as demonstrated in the case of Zina Huntington Jacobs Smith Young, we see that the pattern of male dominance hierarchy was an inherent part of the Priesthood.

One of the most important things Lindsay Hansen Park has demonstrated in her "Year of Polygamy" podcasts is that the term "Priesthood" has significant meaning to fundamentalist Mormonism.  "The Priesthood" is the code-word for male dominance hierarchy, obedience, and subjugation of women through polygamy. Obedient females are rewarded with exaltation as wives of progressively more important priesthood leaders, and lesser males are ultimately pushed out of the society as "unworthy".

We may think that this use of "The Priesthood" no longer carries the same baggage in our modern, mainstream church, but I don't think we can avoid it. The reality is that the term, today, continues to adhere to its original meaning of male dominance hierarchy, but we simply omit living polygamy.

Every aspect of our church is informed by this paradigm.  What we think, feel, and do as Mormons is conditioned to be framed by obedience to the male leaders of the Church.  We revere our Prophets, Seers, and Revelators as being special witness of the Name of Jesus Christ.  Lest we miss this point, Dallin Oaks has made it clear that this "Name" is the "Authority" of Jesus Christ.  The Order of the Church is hierarchical obedience to this authority, "whether by mine own voice or the voice of my servants, it is the same."

When we view core teachings of the Church today, through the temple and Family Proclamation, this paradigm becomes very clear.  The roles of men and women are distinct, and the role of the man is to lead.  In the temple, we covenant that women are to hearken to the counsel of their husbands, as their husbands hearken to the counsel of the Lord.  This is the very definition of a hierarchical relationship between men and women.  And the male dominance hierarchy is clearly demonstrated in how God commands action through the hierarchy of men, and men "return and report" back through the hierarchy to god.

When Eugene England was teaching at BYU, having a question about the nature of god, he received a strong letter of reprimand by Bruce R. McConkie explaining how this hierarchy applied within the Church today.  He wrote:

"It is not in your province to set in order the Church or to determine what is doctrines shall be. It is axiomatic among us to know that God has given apostles and prophets “for the edifying of the body of Christ,” and that their ministry is to see that “we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the slight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive.” (Eph. 4:11-16.) This means, among other things, that it is my province to teach to the Church what the doctrine is. It is your province to echo what I say or to remain silent. You do not have a divine commission to correct me or any of the Brethren. The Lord does not operate that way. If I lead the Church astray, that is my responsibility, but the fact still remains that I am the one appointed with all the rest involved so to do. The appointment is not given to the faculty at Brigham Young University or to any of the members of the Church. The Lord’s house is a house of order and those who hold the keys are appointed to proclaim the doctrines."
(Bruce R. McConkie letter to Eugene England, 2/1/81)

Although the middle part of this message, stating "it is my province to teach the Church what the doctrine is, it is your province to echo what I say or to remain silent", is often used to demonstrate how dictatorial Bruce R McConkie was, we need to understand the full context of the quote.  In context, Bruce R McConkie's full statement above is entirely consistent with the mindset of Church leaders today respecting the discipline they expect from their hierarchical priesthood authorities at all levels in the Church.

Male dominance hierarchy infects every aspect of our Church.  We teach children to follow the prophet, he knows the way, and if I obey, I'll be happy all day.  We teach teenagers that they are unworthy if they deviate in any way from the teachings of the leaders of the Church, and if they entertain any aspects of their emerging sexual identity, they are "unworthy".  Teenagers regularly submit to Priesthood interviews, where the power dynamic of male dominance is strongly reinforced.  The temple endowment and sealing/marriage create covenants to formally lock members into the the male dominance hierarchy, promising that the only real power in the world is the Priesthood.  (And when the temple endowment was created, this had the specific meaning of "Polygamy").  As men progress in their adult lives, the elected ones are given progressive leadership responsibilities commensurate to their obedience to authority, while women are in supportive roles and lesser males are cast aside.

And the worst sin is to embrace any kind of gender identity that doesn't conform to the male dominance hierarchy and subordinate model for women!  Such individuals must be cast out of our presence!  To the male dominance hierarchy, LGBTQ people are an existential threat.

Even many who leave the church are still adversely affected by the male dominance hierarchy.  Feminists justifiably object to it, yet to presume that the answer is to "ordain women", while an important step in the right direction, ordination does not address the elephant in the room: that dominance hierarchy -- the literal meaning of "priesthood" -- is inherently unequal.  A far better thought would be to consider a more egalitarian model and abandon "priesthood" altogether.

The tension around male dominance hierarchy creates a tension in response within the disaffected or unorthodox Mormon communities -- something we are witnessing today.  If a male rises to a position of influence, then any behaviors reflecting the indoctrinated tendencies toward male dominance become troubling.  On one hand, the male in a position of influence needs to be aware and sensitive to his putative privilege, avoiding triggering actions and statements.  On the other hand, subordinated men and women will tend to interpret actions of the influential male in the light of privilege and male dominance.  It can be a no-win situation.

So what do we do about it?

1.  I think we first need to realize that male dominance hierarchy is not part of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  It is a natural tendency of some animals including humans, but this is one of those tendencies that we can put into the category, "The natural man is an enemy to god".  

Jesus, noting that his disciples tended to jockey and fight together to see who was higher in the linear hierarchy, demonstrated that humility -- lowering oneself to serve the very least of these -- is the most exalted position.

Scripture tells us that in Christ, the formal "hierarchy" of the priesthood was done away.  The epistle to the Hebrews speaks of how in Old Testament times, there were priests after the order of Melchizedek.  From this, I believe Joseph Smith felt the need to "restore" such priesthood) -- except that the author of the Hebrews point in discussing this was to demonstrate that in Christ, such hierarchy (literally, "high priesthood") was done away among mankind, and that Jesus, alone, was our High Priest.

2.  The primary commandment, that is, the first, second, greatest, last, and new commandment is to love one another as Jesus has loved us.  This love is perfect, unconditional, complete, and *equal*.

And as we interpret the word "love", we cannot do so within the current Mormon understanding of the word.  To Mormons, love means this:

  • The "dominant" person demonstrates love by correcting the subordinate.
  • The "subordinate" person demonstrates love by obeying the dominant.
Love among equals doesn't work this way.  Sure, there are times when we correct each other in love, and certainly we want to do things that the other person would like us to do -- correcting and obedience are part of healthy, equal relationships.  But there cannot be hierarchy in these loving relationships -- to be One, we must embrace and accept each other in differences, without placing a precedence on one over the other.

I suggest an interesting test.  if I can both give and receive correction without resentment or retaliation, I'm probably in an equal relationship. If I and my partner have a mutual tendency to serve one another with delight, then we are approaching godly love.

Let's just be friends, then.

When Jesus finished his mortal ministry, he changed the relationship between his disciples and him, to one of being "friends".

A friend is a unique relationship -- it's to be equal to each other.  If, according to our doctrine, Jesus Christ is the creator and god over our world, then the idea that he refers to himself as our friend should mean a very great deal to us.  It means that we must set aside any kind of hierarchy, any kind of evaluation as to who is "dominant" versus "subordinate", and start working together in love.  "Priesthood" is an obsolete construct, born of a time when kings and priests controlled people's lives.

Jesus gave us, again and anew, a last commandment: That we love one another as he has loved us.  And as Jesus is our friend in love and equality, then let us do the same.

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

On loving relationships

Have you ever had a friend or lover who simply understands and accepts you for who you are, and you understand and accept them for who they are?  No judgment, not trying to please one another, no expectations whatsoever, just simply the ability to relate and find peace one with another.

From my personal experience, this is rare, and somewhat momentary.  Maybe I'm wrong on this, but I see how most relationships have a sense of conditionality to them: expectations of behavior of the other, a sense of one-sidedness, a sense of who is "superior" versus "inferior", and of course judgment.  Most relationships seem to be evaluative -- constantly conditional on measuring up.

When I think of my relationship with the Christian God, it's more of the ultimately superior (god) - inferior (me) relationship, very one-sided, something in which I simply do not measure up.

I remember distinctly years ago, actually two times in the past, when I was "up" for leadership callings in my church, and I failed some major test I was under.  In like manner, in the work environment, whenever I've been at point of promotion or whatever, I simply rebel whenever I come to the point of evaluation.  Maybe there is something wrong with me -- I was so conflicted inside: wanting to be in some big position to confirm that I was OK with god, but knowing I wasn't "worthy", a part of me would veto getting put into the limelight.

The bottom line is when I am in an evaluative relationship, I develop a sense of unworthiness and self-loathing that torpedoes the relationship.

Am I alone in this?   I honestly don't know.  It seems so, because I see so many others in the journey of life are able to act without this sense of self-doubt that plagues me.

Yet something changed recently.  Over the past few years, my wife has been in the midst of some very deep health issues.  About two months ago, however, her doctors had a breakthrough, and things have steadily improved to the point that she really has found new peace and energy.  Over the weekend, she purchased my ticket to the annual Sunstone Symposium in Utah -- something in the past she disliked me doing, and yet this year, she is encouraging me to spend an entire week doing what I enjoy.

This is really significant. She is very "true believing" and struggles with my faith journey, yet in this simple gesture, she demonstrated that she no longer judges me inferior in faith because of my journey.  We have rekindled mutual respect and love -- something that was missing when our relationship had become very unequal during her extended illness.

And as this new reality sets in, I begin to realize that inequality in relationships does not ultimately feed the soul, but that only the equal, unconditionally loving relationships is true love.

And I realize, that every human being not only yearns for this kind of relationship, but indeed, it is essential for life.  I was listening to a Krista Tippett's podcast recently where it was mentioned that baby elephants require interaction and connection in order to live.  Are we so different?

So I think about it a bit.

If our relationship with god is conditional, then can we really love god, and does god really love us?

If the only form of intimacy allowed is between man and woman in marriage -- what about those who cannot be fulfilled in that kind of relationship?  Is it loving to demand that those who are only attracted to the same sex be alone for all their lives?  Is this really loving?

If we work together and serve one another in our communities and church settings, are we motivated by reward and eventual judgment, or do we serve because we love?

Does asking for help require us to submit to rules and be subordinated in order to be helped?  Is this loving?

If someone asks us for help, is it loving to expect something in return?

I don't know.  It seems like we have zero training on how to unconditionally love in our religions. Every model we get is hierarchical and patriarchal.  Even some of our leaders speak about how god's love is conditional -- so is it any surprise that we cultivate evaluative, unequal relationships and call them loving?

In order for love to be real, in my impression, it needs to be unconditional and equal.  Not every relationship will fit this criteria, but that doesn't absolve me of the responsibility to be loving. If I have any expectation of reward or behavior on the part of the person I love, then my love is not unconditional and equal.  I am basing my love on their behavior, and on my ability to transform their behavior in to what I want them to be.

Certainly this doesn't mean that I am willing to allow them to abuse and exploit me, nor should I be happy with their own self-destructive behaviors. There are boundaries to love.  But these boundaries are distinct from conditions.

I realize, in exploring "how" to love, that I have no easy answers, no deep insight into what makes a truly loving relationship.  I only know this, that I seem to do best when I am loved without judgment and conditions, and I find that others respond in kind, when I accept them for who they are, without judgment or conditions.

When I was at the depths of my crisis nearly thirty years ago, I reached out to the god who I thought was to be my judge, who inspired the teachings of my church and required my exact obedience, for no unclean thing could enter His presence.

I reached out when I was as "unclean" and "unworthy" as I could possibly imagine, driven by guilt and shame into an ever-deepening cycle of addiction and self-destruction. I loathed myself.

And yet, instead of judgment or conditions, when I reached out I felt this sense of love wash over me, a Presence that told me that I was fully accepted by god, and that god loved me without any conditions.  This Presence has let me know that to me, this is what it means to see the face of God, to know that God is, and that this Presence is real.

And I return to this Presence when I contemplate his words:
Jesus said, "Love one another, as I have loved you."

And I realize, in these moments, that the gift of God's love becomes real, when I learn to love others without judgment or conditions.

Thursday, April 27, 2017

On Conversations about Faith Crisis

I think a lot of us struggle with how to converse about our journey amid faith crisis with our traditional believing LDS family, friends, and church leaders.  Often, traditional believers want us simply to come back to traditional belief and set aside our doubts -- to "doubt our doubts" and retrench into reading, praying, and attending -- and all will be well.

Oh, if it were only that easy!

In contrast, when we come to realize that the dominant narrative of our whitewashed history and "the prophets cannot lead the church astray" is not true, then we feel compelled to share our perspective with our traditional believing friends and leaders, in a hope that they'll understand why we are having such challenges.

And the moment we open our mouths to question the dominant narrative, they stop listening, and we've gone into a different kind of relationship -- one where we hide our true feelings, "tolerate" each other, or simply part ways.

Is there a way through this impasse?

I believe there is a Middle Way through this -- a way of conversing about our faith journey in a way that helps our traditional believing friends understand us better, and helps us feel more inclusive and included with them.

Empathy requires us to put ourselves into the position of the other, to feel what they feel, to look back at ourselves through their eyes.  It's obviously a mutual process, but we cannot ask others to be empathetic.  We must learn to speak in a way that they understand.  We need to use the language of faithful Mormonism to express our journey as "part of" a faithful Mormon journey, rather than a "transition away" from true belief.

How do we do this?  How do we *honestly* talk about "faith crisis" while using terms, concepts, and language of Mormon faith?

I believe that the doctrines of our church have the answer to solve this riddle.  I do not believe we will get anywhere with using the framework of "faith transition" as a descriptor of what is going on.  Instead, I would like to frame the discussion in terms that the most faithful LDS not only would accept, but would embrace fully.  And the way to do this is to frame what is going on in terms of core doctrine and scripture.

What is the purpose of life according to LDS doctrine?  We often say that this mortality is a test, where we will be "proven herewith".  When we view that test in terms of a "final exam" -- a "judgment" -- it puts all of us into the form of judging ourselves and others as being "unworthy".  But when I studied the concept of the Trial of Faith in depth years ago, I discovered that the "trial of faith" is not a "test" in the way that we use the term.  The Trial of Faith -- the entire purpose of this life -- is *refinement": We are to be made pure by refining the gold within us: our divine nature.

So the first thing I would do is frame "faith crisis" as "trial of faith": we are going through an essential process that will bring us closer to god.  It's not a test, it's part of God's plan for us.

Second, I would try to make clear that the trial of faith is not successful if we revert to our old ways of thinking.  Again, Mormon Doctrine comes into play here: we are on a path of eternal progression -- we learn, line upon line, and precept upon precept, to come closer to god and understand the principles of the gospel.  As we go through our trial of faith, we will discover things that no longer serve us: teachings that while may be useful for us initially, have no longer served their purpose.

I would bring up at this point the entire blacks-and-the-priesthood thing.  Before 1978, many people in the church felt that this was God's plan, and framed the inequity as being a deserved, chosen position from the premortal existence.  Bruce R McConkie was a primary proponent of such thinking, yet when the revelation came out in 1978, McConkie recognized that they all spoke from limited understanding.  Perhaps the entire blacks-and-the-priesthood was a kind of trial of faith for the whole church -- the outcome of which was not to harden our position, but rather, to seek revelation from god, and when the church was ready for it, it received it.

Third, we need to understand, fully, that our purpose in this life is not a test of obedience, but rather, to learn through our own experience to distinguish good and evil.  The Garden of Eden narrative in the temple is case in point.  Unlike other Christians, we celebrate Eve's decision to partake of the fruit to make progress happen.  Without it, they would never have progressed. But it's important to recognize that "be fruitful and multiple" and "don't partake of the fruit" ended up being an impossible situation to obey both.  So Adam and Eve counseled together in their trial of faith, and made the best choice they could.  In so doing, they learned through their own experience to distinguish good and evil, and were stronger because of it.

We need to resist the urge to judge others on their choices amid their "trial of faith".  Some of us will leave the "Garden of Eden" of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  Some of us will refuse to partake of the dogma of the tree of knowledge of good and evil (aka, "correlated doctrine").  These are all very tough choices to make.  If we stand by our doctrine that free-agency is the very essence of our humanity, we need to realize that each one of us is faced with choices, and one size -- or one choice -- does not work for everyone.

And lastly, I think we need to teach the principle of Love as the Connecting Principle of the Atonement.  We need to embrace the diversity of our culture rather than force conformity.  Heavenly Father has given us differing gifts -- this is in our scripture and doctrine -- and we need to embrace love for one another -- active, practical, practicing love for one another -- as the core of LDS doctrine.  This means that we lift each other's burdens, mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those standing in need of comfort.  Love never fails -- our Relief Society motto.  When we embrace god's unconditional (perfect - teleios) love (agape - the pure love of Christ), then we cannot exclude or excommunicate anyone for their lack of belief or for whom they choose to love.

So why bother with all this?

I truly believe that our "trial of faith" is more than a "faith crisis", and is definitely not a "faith transition" from one kind of faith to another.  If anything, the refinement of our faith is part of our "Plan of Salvation", of eternal progression, where we are not static beings, but those embracing higher principles as we grow on this journey of eternal life.

We have not lost our faith.  Instead, our faith is being refined -- we are growing closer to a personal relationship with god, while setting aside those things which no longer serve us.  This is a cause for celebration, not pride or arrogance, but of deep gratitude for this amazing journey.

Not everyone is at the same point in this journey.  As we embrace a more inclusive faith, we need to as well, include our traditional believing LDS brothers and sisters as neither against our journey, nor inferior to our place on the journey.  We need to find that which is in common, and realize that in loving and serving one another, we can grow together.

When we speak in supportive love to our friends, family, and leaders, we can grow together in that Love.  We need to set aside our own angst and language of faith transition, crisis, and nuance, but rather, share values through our common Mormon language and doctrine.  Then, and only then, will we change hearts and minds: both ours and theirs.

And we then can become One.

Monday, April 24, 2017

On Being Pro-Choice

I remember distinctly, years ago, when my very good conservative friend asked me what my position was on abortion.  At that time, oh, some thirty years ago, I did not have an opinion.  He was shocked.

So I went on a quest to figure out what I really believed.  At first, like many other republicans at the
time (yes, in those days I was a reliable republican), I was utterly horrified at the tragedy of abortion. But I also worked with a woman who had had one -- and to her, it was truly one of the hardest and most soul-searching moments in her life.  This made the issue very real to me.

I realized, from the woman I worked with, that there was a personal element. When a woman doesn't choose to become pregnant, I hardly thought it fair to require her to carry the child of her rapist -- she didn't have a choice, and yet such an ordeal would have life-long implications. Likewise, cases of incest, and the health of mother or child -- all seem to indicate that there are some cases where abortion can be justified. I landed on a position: that abortion should be allowed in the cases of rape, incest, and health of the mother or fetus.

Perhaps not coincidentally, my personal position landed exactly on the same position held by the LDS church.  I hope this wasn't confirmation bias, but it seemed reasonable.

But then, I had to also realize, "Who decides?"  And in considering this, even if I am personally opposed to abortion on demand or for convenience, I realized that this choice is not mine to make -- it's entirely in the hands of the one person who must make that choice: the woman.

I choose, therefore, to be firmly "pro-choice".  I see this position is fundamental to our values as Americans and critical to my personal faith.

Here is my journey through this issue:

The "pro-choice" position is not "pro-abortion". Can I be "pro-choice" and be against abortion "on demand"? Of course. The motivation behind "pro-choice" is to enable people to make their own choices as to what will happen with their own bodies. So pro-choice is about the freedom for women to choose what they can do over their bodies without religious or state intervention.

And yes, as long as a fetus is dependent upon a woman's body, then her choice matters, completely.

As Mormons, we should have a more enlightened position on this issue, and if we understand our own doctrine, we should be pro-choice. We do believe, firmly, that we should have our agency to choose, so the very nature of the "pro-choice" decision is in harmony with our core doctrines.  But it's not just about being Mormon here -- it's a fundamental issue that goes deep to religious belief and why such "choice" should be taken out of the hands of the State, for the "pro-life" position establishes one religious interpretation over another, and thus violates the First Amendment establishment clause.

The LDS Church has a position on abortion, that in the cases of rape, incest, and the *health* of the mother and fetus, abortion is allowed (the leadership would prefer to have the woman and man counsel with the Bishop in these cases). No woman should be forced to carry the offspring of her rapist, or of an abusive, incestuous man. No woman should be forced to sacrifice her life to preserve a fetus. There are also cases where the fetus is so non-viable that its death in utero would cause serious health risks.

We may say that such cases are rare, but there are enough of them to justify consideration of them in enforcing "pro-life" laws. Who arbitrates such things? How do you define "rape"? If a husband rapes his wife, should she have to accuse him of rape before the law before she has an abortion? What if she is dependent upon him for income?

These issues are thorny at best, and the law is a very blunt instrument to determine what a woman can do with her own body.

But there is much more here. We may say that the scriptures say, "Thou shalt not kill". Yet, what in scripture defines life? What constitutes a "life" in the law? In scripture, "life" was equated with "ruach" in Hebrew, "pneuma" in Greek, and "spiritus" in Latin -- all having the same meaning: "breath". In other words, a "life" according to the scriptures always began at birth's first "breath" and not before. (Evangelicals will raise the "before thou was formed in the womb" in Jeremiah, and the how the fetus of John the Baptist leaped in Elisabeth's womb; but these cases are ambiguous at best as to when life starts -- more on this later).

The Torah is even more specific on this. In Exodus 21:22-25, we read:
"If men strive, and hurt a woman with child, so that her fruit depart from her, and yet no mischief follow: he shall be surely punished, according as the woman’s husband will lay upon him; and he shall pay as the judges determine. And if any mischief follow, then thou shalt give life for life, Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, Burning for burning, wound for wound, stripe for stripe."
This is the ONLY instance in scripture that refers to a woman losing her fetus: "so that her fruit depart from her" explicitly means the loss and death of the fetus. The consequence was that the man who caused the injury would pay the husband for the inconvenient loss of a potential offspring. That's it. But if an mischief follow -- that is, if the woman is then killed, then the person as then -- and ONLY then -- committed murder.

So where did this idea that abortion is wrong come from?

In Rabbinical Judaism, the Talmudic scholars postulated that life probably started before birth -- after all, a woman feels life in her womb during the second trimester, as the fetus' nervous system is beginning to operate. So, to prevent any possibility of violating the law, the Rabbinical approach was to build a fence around the law -- make it impossible to violate the law -- by restricting abortion.

Catholicism went further. To Catholics -- and hence, all protestants, the human soul does not exist before conception -- they have no belief in pre-mortal existence of humans. Thus, when a child is conceived, then a "new life" has begun to form -- one with an immortal soul. So, the logic goes, if you terminate a pregnancy, you are killing an immortal soul created by god.

This brings us to the real reason abortion is an issue in politics today. As part of the "Southern Strategy" to push Catholics and socially aware evangelicals toward the Republican party, the minds behind the Nixon and Reagan machines decided to make abortion a party issue. It was brilliant -- it forced most Catholics to move from being very socially liberal democrats to one-issue Republicans. We need to call this issue for what it is, and what Hugh Nibley called it: A Decoy.

But back to the doctrines about abortion. Mormons do not share these Jewish and Christian beliefs as to when the human soul begins. Mormons believe that the human spirit is co-eternal with god and exists before this life. Moreover, the spirit fully enters the body only at birth -- although you won't find this explicitly stated. The evidence for this is (1) that Jesus Christ visited the Nephites and Lamanites on the night before his birth, just hours or minutes before he was born over in the Jerusalem area, some nine hours ahead of the New World. (2) Temple work is never performed for still-born children. While there is no doubt that parents feel the loss of their still-born child, the church does not actually do ordinance work for them. Again, these aren't widely talked about things, but they are inherent to the doctrine.

Thus, whenever we get into a discussion as to whether abortion should be allowed or prohibited, the question comes into whether we are establishing a religion here. To prevent abortion is to establish one religious view over another. To support choice is to say that if your religion says that abortion is evil, then by all means, don't have an abortion. Pro-choice is the only acceptable alternative that separates church and state and allows us to freely exercise our religion according to the dictates of our own conscience for ourselves. We should NEVER have the right to force our religious views on others.

So as a Mormon and an American, I firmly believe that "pro-choice" is more than just a pro-abortion/anti-abortion issue. It's fundamental to the core principles of our democracy.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Does the War Go On?

In the Mormon Church's April 2017 Ensign Magazine, Elder Larry Lawrence of the Seventy wrote an article entitled, "The War Goes On".


I believe it is patently harmful to continue the drumbeat of Mormons against the world.  It's not only a tired, trite message, but it's really harmful.  In this article, Elder Lawrence instills fear and loathing of the world and its evil influences, stemming from his view that the "War in Heaven" continues in this world.

It's truly an awful article.  Rather than linking to it, you can search on the LDS website for it. One friend told me that his Bishop, upon reading the article, feels that it is essential doctrine, and has scheduled a special meeting to cover it.  If I were to attend such a meeting, here is what I would have in my pocket as discussion points:

Elder Lawrence said, "Satan’s strategy was to frighten people. He knew that fear is the best way to destroy faith."

I think we should agree with this statement.  Indeed, fear of others, and of the "world" is indeed what causes "faith", i.e. trust, to be destroyed.

Question to consider:
  • Does the war-time metaphor we use in our discussion of Us vs The World instill love or fear in us?  
  • When Jesus counseled us to love our enemies, can we be justified in condemning others?
Elder Lawrence asked, "How could a spirit with so much knowledge and experience fall so far? It was because of his pride...he wanted God's kingdom for himself."

Again, we can agree with this statement.  Whenever we set ourselves up as above others, and exclusive in our "kingdom", we are becoming like the Zoramites -- prideful in our exclusiveness, prideful in our repeated "testimonies", prideful in our condemnation of those who are not like us.

Question to consider:
  • When President Benson taught that Lucifer "wished to be honored above others", in what way does this apply to us?  
Elder Lawrence asks, "Why did you and I fight against the devil?"

Questions to consider:
  • Is there any evidence in scripture that we fought against Satan? or,
  • Is it more likely that we supported God's plan, and it was Satan who fought against us, in trying to bring us into bondage to fixed rules and regulations that guaranteed we could not make mistakes?
Elder Lawrence asks, "Why were Satan's hosts allowed to come to earth?" and is answers, "to provide opposition for those who are being tested here."  He then goes on for several paragraphs explaining how desperate Satan is to tempt and capture our souls.

Questions to consider:
  • Does teaching that Satan's hosts are here to provide opposition for us give us hope or does it instill fear in us? 
  • How does this teaching fit with Paul's explanation to Timothy (2 Tim 1:7) "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."?
Elder Lawrence teaches us that memorizing scripture is a way to resist temptation.

Question to consider:
  • When Elder Lawrence quotes "Love your enemies", in what way does this help us "resist Satan"?  
Elder Lawrence lays out his second strategy "Lies and Deception."

Questions to consider:
  • Does anyone actually say, "You need to try everything at least once -- just to gain experience. One time won't hurt you." Isn't this a bit of a strawman?  If we misrepresent what others say, are we being honest?
  • If the Church practices deception over its secret support of legislation, over the definition of marriage (our scriptures define marriage as one man and one or many women, see section 132), over historical and doctrinal issues in the past; and if Satan is the father of lies as Elder Lawrence says, then in what way is deception by the Church from god?
Elder Lawrence contends that "same sex marriage is only a counterfeit".

Questions to consider:
  • What is the celestial role of marriage?  In other words, what does "marriage" entitle us to have in the eternities?  (The answer is that marriage -- particularly, polygamous marriage -- is only necessary to enter the highest degree of the celestial kingdom, where people will be populating worlds without end).
  • If a person is lesbian or gay, and the counsel is that they are to remain celibate throughout their life, then how can they qualify for the "highest degree of the celestial kingdom", not having been married in this life?
  • If God's perspective in the Garden of Eden is it is not good for man to be alone, then how does the current church counsel justify condemning a gay or lesbian person to live alone for their entire life, unable to have a relationship with someone they love?
Elder Lawrence condemns "counterfeits" with D&C 50:23: "That which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness."

Indeed, LDS policy on condemning same sex marriages is indeed darkness.  It has caused a dramatic increase in suicides and attempted suicides in Mormon-dominated areas.  This is demonstrated by the data, since 2008, suicides among affected populations have tripled.  This isn't just about altitude, for there has been no change in altitude in Utah since 2008.

Question to consider:
  • In what way does the LDS policy declaring loving same sex married people apostates edify anyone?
Elder Lawrence condemns contention in the Church.

Question to consider:
  • When we condemn others, labeling them our enemies and servants of Satan in a battle, are we being loving or contentious?
This is truly a bad article -- toxic in the extreme.  We need to stop these destructive war-metaphors in the church.

Sunday, April 16, 2017

An Easter Liturgy

I have always loved Easter, above all other holy-days of the year.  It’s a glorious moment in Christianity: Christ the Lord is risen today!  Hallelujah!

The dark clouds of despair have fled away.  The Spring morning breaks, the sky is clear, the sun rises in the East, and in this morning, we embrace New Life as the Christ becomes immensely real to us.  The first Followers of the Way – as Christ’s disciples were first called – declared to each other in greeting: “He is Risen”; and the response: “Risen indeed”.

I love the Easter narratives in Scripture. The gentle intimacy of Mary Magdalene’s encounter with the Risen Christ.  The appearance with the Apostles.  The appearance to the two wayfarers on the road to Damascus.  We celebrate these stories as we embrace the singular idea that "He is Risen".

Risen indeed.  What does that mean?

I believe there is some very important dimensions in the simple interaction, “He is Risen” and “Risen indeed”.

I ask myself a question: What does the idea that Christ rose from the dead mean to me?

For Mormons, we embrace the idea that Jesus physically rose from the dead, with an immortal exalted body, as the first-fruits of all others who will be resurrected physically in the future.  Our scriptures proclaim that body and spirit, inseparably connected, achieve a fullness of joy.  Yet for me, this promise of future physical life after death is so remote, so far off in the future, I struggle with how it changes my life here and now.  If I embrace the connecting principle of Love in the Atonement, does it really matter what kind of “reward” I’ll receive in the future?  I think not.  I hope that we aren’t so “carrot” motivated that we love others because we expect a future award.   Love should be its own reward – Love seeketh not its own.

A second dimension is that because Christ rose from the dead, he lives.  This is very real to me.   I was once in the depths of addiction, mainly because of the guilt I felt.  I could never drink moderately, because I felt that I had already sinned, so I might as well enjoy it. It became an obsession -- i simply could not stop. I went into AA, because frankly, all church repentance processes, including going to bishop after bishop, failed to work. At the point that I 'turned my will and my life over' to a higher power, whom I felt was 'Christ', I had a complete removal of even the desire to drink at all. ever.  In a moment of clarity, I came to know that for me Jesus lives, and is tangibly real.  I did not have to go through a period of "repentance" and proving myself worthy.  At that moment, and so many times thereafter, I came to the deep realization that atonement of Jesus Christ is absolutely real and tangible. I attribute this personal miracle to Christ. While this release from addiction could have been a result of releasing myself from church-imposed guilt, I don't know, nor do I care. The personal, spiritual experience I had from this release was very tangible to me.

But I have to say, that the personal witness of Christ I received had absolutely nothing to do with Christ having a physical body.  In Paul’s letters to the Corinthians, he expresses how Christ physical body died, but rose spiritually. On the Road to Damascus, Paul met the Christ, spiritually.  Many of us have had a spiritual experience with Christ – these witness of a living presence, but do not provide evidence of a physical body, nor is the physical body necessary.

So I’m still at the point that I don’t know what “He is risen” means, as it applies to “the flesh”.

I find an answer as Paul poses an interesting question to the Colossians: “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God.”  The term “ye be risen” here is important: “συνηγέρθητε”/synigerthite, is in the aorist passive indicative second person plural tense, meaning that the act of being risen has already happened and applies to all time, present, past, and future.  English doesn’t have this tense, so we cannot fully grasp the significance of the term. We misinterpret the term to apply to the future – when we WILL BE risen; and that is not what Paul meant.  He meant that we have already been risen with Christ.

My thinking pauses for a moment as I contemplate this.  Have I been risen with Christ? Have I had a mighty change of heart? Can I feel so now?   These are the questions that my Mormon self asks, and the answer comes in a still small voice – I have experienced his unconditional, undeserved love!  Christ transformed me from addict, from unworthiness, from self-loathing, to becoming alive and free from such addiction, unworthiness, and self-loathing.  I cannot say that it is a permanent state of mind, but I certainly have tasted of the Love of God, and while I struggle to keep that feeling, Jesus words in the upper room come back to my mind:

“And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.  And whither I go ye know, and the Way ye know.” (John 14:3-4)

And that Way, is connecting in love, one to another.

On the very first day of this faith journey, I went to an AA shelter, and an old man, barely coherent, looked at me and told me exactly what I needed to know.   The details aren’t important, but a week later, everything he said would happen, happened while I was on a trip – I had received the help I needed from the Lord, and felt unconditional, unmerited Love.  When I returned from the trip, I was told the old man was now in a hospice dying of brain cancer, that he had been completely senile for some time.  In other words, a senile, incoherent ex-alcoholic was god’s messenger to me. Go figure.

A few weeks later, as I was trying to walk this new journey in the Spirit, I had a distinct feeling that Jesus wanted to visit with me that day.  It was cold, a little icy, and I decided to take the back roads rather than the interstate.  As I began to drive to work, the thought came to me again, that Jesus would ride with me, so I cleared the junk off the passenger seat.  I felt a little silly, to be sure.  Then in my mind, I saw Jesus under a bridge, with two arches.  Later, as I turned onto Route 1, driving along, I saw a hitchhiker under a railroad trestle.  I don’t pick up hitchhikers, so I passed him by.

Then, I thought about the two wayfarers on the Road to Damascus.  I turned around – and on Route 1, this is dangerous, and a little stupid. I came back picked up my hitchhiker.  We rode for a while, and I kept trying to engage him in question – seeking to find the Savior’s voice. And, well, nothing.  He just was a hitchhiker trying to get a ride on a cold morning.

Talking to my AA sponsor, later, he asked me, “What’s your problem, one of God’s children needed a ride, and you gave it to him.”

Why is it that we Mormons are so caught up on our eventual great reward in the heavens as resurrected, exalted beings, that we often forget to see how we are to be gods to each other here, now, and in this life.   Jesus said, “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” (Matthew 25:40).

I confess I do not know if Jesus rose again in HIS flesh, but I have come to confess that Jesus is Risen, Risen Indeed in MY flesh, when I love you, and in YOUR flesh, when you love me.  Inconsistent beings, we are for sure, but in the moment we love, the connecting power of the Atonement becomes infinitely real.

So today, in love, I embrace the Easter Liturgy:

He is Risen!  Risen Indeed!

Saturday, April 15, 2017

A Liturgy on the Spirit World and Beyond


As I passed my local Catholic Church this morning, I noticed the parking lot is empty, for the first time this week.  All other days during Holy Week, Christianity celebrates pivotal events in the Passion of Christ.  Yet today, Saturday, there are no masses, no services, no formal, institutional worship of god.

God has died.

(sigh)

I was prepared, in contrast, to seek from our LDS scriptures, a point of view on the Spirit World that doesn’t view this time between the Crucifixion and Resurrection in such bleak terms, that Christ died and ascended instead to a glorious spirit world.  I opened up to Doctrine and Covenants, Section 138, highlighting Joseph F. Smiths dream-vision of the afterlife.  He starts with his contemplation of 1 Peter chapters 3 and 4, quoting:
“For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit: By which also he went and preached unto the spirits in prison; Which sometime were disobedient, when once the longsuffering of God waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was a preparing, wherein few, that is, eight souls were saved by water.”
(1 Peter 3:18–20)
“For for this cause was the gospel preached also to them that are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit.”
(1 Peter 4:6)
Then, Joseph F. Smith sees in vision, an “innumerable company of the spirits of the just, who had been faith in the testimony of Jesus while they lived in mortality…they were filled with joy and gladness, and were rejoicing together because the day of their deliverance was at hand…There Jesus preached to them the everlasting gospel, the doctrine of the resurrection, and redemption of mankind from the fall, and from individual sins on conditions of repentance.  But to the wicked he did not go, and among the ungodly and the unrepentant who had defiled themselves while in the flesh, his voice was not raised.”

As I read President Smith’s words, my heart sank.  The Jesus I have come to know visited me in my unworthiness, when I was in the midst of addiction and self-condemnation.  The Jesus I have read about in the Gospels communed with publicans and sinners – the “unjust”, not with those who were the “just”.  The Christ who met with his disciples washed the feet of all of God’s children, even he who would betray him.  The Christ who gave his last commandment, his New Commandment, told us to love one another, as he has loved us, that is, unconditionally.  And when Christ was crucified, he proclaimed, “tetelestai” – “It is completed”, meaning, that the connection of love between heaven and earth, between saint and sinner, between us and all that is, is now complete, whole, and unconditional.

(sigh)

To be honest, I’m struggling with the contradiction between President Smith’s exclusive vision of the paradise of the holy versus the prison of the sinners.  I struggle, because I wonder, “where is the dividing line between saint and sinner?”  Is there really an “us” versus “them” in the eternities?

The thought makes reason stare.

I truly think there are some wonderful ideas in Mormon thought, but the hard-line dualism between us and the rest of the world is not one of them.  It’s not loving.  It’s not edifying.  And to me, those two failings of this theology – this specific dualism – witnesses that it isn’t of god.  God is Love, universal, absolute, unconditional love.  Yes, if we Love him in return, we WILL keep his commandments, and which commandments?  We will love one another as Jesus and God have loved us.

And again, to be honest, I do not know that there is an afterlife.  Yet, there are a large number of anecdotal stories of near death experiences that give me pause – there are enough hints that keep my faith in our afterlife story alive in me.

One of the most common experiences in these near death experiences, completely uncorrelated with what kind of life one has lived before, is that in entering into the next life, three things happen:

1. We are greeted in unconditional love and kindness.
2. We see, in perspective, the events of our life, and feeling sorrow for our fears and lack of love,
3. We are motivated to be more loving, inclusive, and kind to all.

I sense that these perspectives are largely formed by our cultural biases, but that may well be the skeptic in me.  Yet what I hear from these near death experiences – almost all of them – is that the next life is characterized by unconditional love.

Nearly thirteen years ago, my mother passed away.  It was a tough two years before she died; she was in chronic pain, had become addicted to opiates, and had developed multiple infarct dementia.  Coherent conversation ended perhaps six months before she died, and for the last several months, she couldn’t speak.  Yet, on Mother’s Day, 2004, one week before she died, she told me, in clear voice, “I love you, Mark.  I love you, Mark”.

A few weeks later, we had a family wedding of one of my nieces in the St. George Temple.  The sealing room was so packed we had to sit three people to every two chairs.  For whatever reason, at the last minute, the chair one seat away from my niece vacated.  This is where my mother would have sat were she alive for this event.  I checked – it wasn’t intentional, yet in my heart, I knew that she was there, for she loved this niece and had felt a special connection with her.

To this day, nearly thirteen years later, I miss my mother with all my heart.  Do I know that I will be with her in the eternities?  No, I don’t know.  But I hope, I have faith, that God is loving beyond all that I can possibly imagine, and in that Love, things will just work out.

So in this walk this week in Jesus’ last week of life, I walk into this spirit world.  I place myself today, not on the Cross, nor in the tomb, but walking into this spirit world.  Will this be a prison or paradise for me?  If I had to choose, based upon my own self-condemnation and hatred for the many stupid, selfish things I do, I pretty sure I with the sinners.

It’s a good thing Billy Joel is here as well (sorry, I couldn’t resist).

But I am wrong in this assessment.  Not the “sinner” part – that’s pretty clear.  But the prison, as it turns out, is in my mind – my self-defeating behaviors, my compulsions, where I exercise control, dominion, or compulsion over myself, or over others – these are the prisons of my mind.  Paradise is all around me, and I fail to see it.

But this I know.  In walking with Jesus in this Spirit World, I am walking with him in BOTH prison and paradise.  They are not separate places, but rather, separate states of mind – or better said, a “separated” state of mind.  Our dualistic thinking, our black-and white mentalities, our favoring of those like us and condemning of others – all things that separate ourselves – these are the prisons of our mind.  These are the Hell that we experience not just in the afterlife, but rather, they are a living hell, here and now: our fears, anxieties, hatreds, angers, contempts, and disgusts bind us with the chains of Hell.

And Jesus comes, to liberate the captives – us – from these bonds.  The Atonement is the connecting principle of Love that frees us from our self-defeating behaviors, for if we Love, our fears cannot paralyze us in anxiety, but rather, we act in love to overcome them.  Our angers will not morph into contempt and disgust, for we will seek loving answers one with another.  The Atonement – God’s unconditional love – marks the path and leads the way, and every point defines, to light and life, and endless day, where God’s full presence shines.

Where is this afterlife?  Where is this Spirit World?  In some of our theology, we presume that this Spirit World is not in some separate place in the sky, but around us.  This is a scary thought, in a way, thinking that all of our ancestors are watching us as we do embarrassing things… but this a literalized absurdity.  If we think of the Spirit World, not as "there", but *here*; if we think of Eternity not as "then", but *now*, a new perspective arises:

Life before death.

What if, to take the perspective of a near death experience, I think in terms of a “new life experience”?  What if, as I contemplate this Spirit World into which we have entered, I think in terms of what happens in a near death experience:

1. Can I seek for and find the unconditional love and kindness all around me?
2. Can I see, in perspective, the events of my life, and feeling sorrow for my fears and lack of love?
3. Can I be motivated to be more loving, inclusive, and kind to all?

As I have walked this week with you in the last steps of Jesus’ mortal ministry, I have come to realize that Love is the entire meaning of the Atonement.  Nothing else matters.  But love is not an abstract feeling, it finds in me, the need to see the love around me, assess whether I am being loving – not to condemn myself in shame, but rather, to find what I need to do better – and then, day by day, walk with you, sharing each other’s burdens, mourning together, and comforting each other.

And the Comforter comes, and abides, in this very moment.

The Spirit World is here, now, and forever.

Friday, April 14, 2017

A Good Friday Liturgy

For most of Christianity, Good Friday is the holiest of days, more holy than Easter or Christmas – something I’ve never quite understood.  Even the name baffles me.  “Good”.  And then the symbol of the Cross --  I don’t think as Mormons, we have any real theology or symbolism in the Cross – in fact, I believe we shun it.

Perhaps there is a good reason to shun the Cross.  There is an aspect of this that it’s use in Roman times was as an instrument of torture and capital punishment.  Christ was not the only one crucified, but many were.  Over time, there seems to be no limit to who cruel people can treat others in the name of justice, and I wonder why anyone would use it as an affirming symbol.  Would we use a noose, guillotine, or electric chair as a symbol for something good?  I hardly think so.

I have long held this opinion, perhaps unkindly so.  When I was on my mission, having contracted Typhoid fever, I was rushed to a Catholic hospital, and feeling like I was about to die, asked that the symbol of a Cross be removed from the room.  As a rather self-righteous, unempathetic Mormon missionary, I failed to realize how offensive my request was.

Since those days of my youthful folly, I have come to realize the deep significance in the Cross as a symbol to so many Christians.  It is not just as a symbol of the suffering and death of Jesus Christ to atone for our sins, but for how the Cross represents the center of all that is – the nexus between heaven and earth, between life and death, between body and spirit.  In a deeply paradoxical way, the symbol of death becomes the center of life.

And Jesus knew this.  Deeply.  The beginning of the Passion narrative in John, starts: “Jesus knew that his hour was come that he should depart out of this world” (John 13:1).  While I suspect that he knew the forces of evil were marshalling against him – any revolutionary heretic would know this – there was something more in his prophecy.

He knew that he needed to die, but the reason he gave in John wasn’t to satisfy justice, to pay a ransom for guilt, or to be our substitute for the penalties we deserve.  He said, “But now I go my way to him that sent me; and … because I have said these things unto you, sorrow hath filled your heart.  Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you.” (John 16:5-7)

Thus, the reason Jesus died, according to his own words in John, was that we might have the Comforter abide with us.  Why was this the only way?  It seems incomprehensible to me.

Perhaps, if I stop trying to think this through, and put myself into the narrative through creatively contemplating what happened next, perhaps the answer is yet to come.

On Friday morning, the Sanhedrin convened a “Church Disciplinary Court” on Jesus of Nazareth.  This is not so hard to imagine for us today – it seems to happen often, when someone doesn’t quite fit into the norm of LDS rules.  Jesus’ encounter with the Sanhedrin sounds ominously familiar.  He stands alone, with the Council surrounding him as his accusers.  They try all sorts of charges against him, and finding nothing, they elicit a direct confession from him.  Indeed they ask, “Are you, then, the Son of God?”  Jesus answered, “I AM what [you say] I AM”.  Consider what he said.  The most sacred name, JHVH, means something like “I AM”, as revealed to Moses on the mount.  God said, “I AM that/what I AM” to Moses, and then said, “Go tell them that I AM (JHWH) sent you.”  To the Church leaders of the time, this was the highest form of blasphemy.

Was Jesus the Son of God?  Was he JHWH, the very God they worshiped from Abraham?  Jesus had said in John 9, “Before Abraham was, I AM”, again invoking the Sacred Name.  To the Jews and Christians alike, God is not a human being, so for a human to suggest that he is in any way “God”, is a profound blasphemy: it is taking the name of God in vain.  It is worshiping the creature rather than the creator.  God cannot be human, he is forever “the Other”, the “Numinous” – that which, being uncreated, is outside from us – wholly different.

Yet this man, this mortal being Jesus of Nazareth, proclaimed, “I AM”.   That was enough for them.  He was excommunicated on the spot, and would have been stoned to death if the Disciplinary Council weren’t subject to Roman rule.   So they sent Jesus off to Pilate.

Yet they had a problem: blasphemy is not a capital offense to Romans.  They make Emperors their god all the time, so the idea that a man could be god would be no big deal.  So, instead, they trumped up charges that Jesus made himself a King.  How Jesus and Pilate respond to this charge dominates the rest of the Passion narrative.  The Way in which Jesus Christ is King becomes the answer as to why Jesus had to die in order for us to live in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Jesus and Pilate engage in a brief but deep philosophical discussion:

Pilate entered into the judgment hall again, and called Jesus, and said unto him, “Art thou the King of the Jews?”
 Jesus answered him, “Sayest thou this thing of thyself, or did others tell it thee of me?”
Pilate answered, “Am I a Jew? Thine own nation and the chief priests have delivered thee unto me: what hast thou done?”
Jesus answered, “My kingdom is not of this world: if my kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my kingdom not from hence.”
Pilate therefore said unto him, “Art thou a king then?”
Jesus answered, “[as] Thou sayest, I am a king. To this end was I born, and for this cause came I into the world, that I should bear witness unto the truth. Every one that is of the truth heareth my voice.”
Pilate saith unto him, “What is truth?”  And when he had said this, he went out again unto the Jews, and saith unto them, I find in him no fault at all,”

Pilate’s reasoning was to determine if Jesus was a King in the sense of the world, and that such a King would constitute insurrection.  But instead, Jesus spoke of another kind of Kingdom, one inside each of us, as he had taught earlier, “the Kingdom of Heaven is within”.  It is a Kingdom where “I AM, the Way, the Truth, and the Life”, and as such, “Truth” is the essence.

Pilate understood completely. Asking, “What is Truth” without seeking an answer, he concludes, “I find no fault in him at all.”  and asks the Jews if he should release their King.  Their answer?  “We have no king but Caesar.

As I contemplate this scene, and all else that follows, the “crown” of thorns, the sign above his head, “Jesus of Nazareth, King of the Jews”, I begin to realize that Jesus Kingdom is not of this world, and may never be so in my lifetime.

Yet we continually put up men to be our leaders and kings, priests and presidents.  We seek to have a powerful hero fight our battles for us.  We are King-men and women, seeking to have a powerful leader who can fix that which we cannot fix ourselves.

Are we any different than the people at the time of Samuel who demanded that they have a king?  Were the people of the time of Christ any different?  They expected on Palm Sunday that Jesus would be their King, and, disappointing them, turned against Him.

The reality is that we cannot truly be One in love one to another if we continue to look toward Power and Authority figures rather than taking responsibility for loving one another ourselves.  As long as there is a King and hierarchy, we cannot be One with each other.  The Atonement is not possible as long as there is a Man in charge who is the exclusive focus of our love and admiration.

Yet in this moment of the Cross, such philosophical notions about kingship and truth are abstractions to be dealt with another day.  We are at the moment of Jesus crucifixion, the death of our God and King, and our hearts mourn.  We walk the path of sorrows, trying to find meaning, and such meaning eludes us in the present.

The Cross sits high above us, seemingly connecting heaven and earth.  Darkness surrounds us, as we deepen in sorrow: why does this have to be?  Our souls, like the veil of the temple, are rent in grief.  No easy or quick answers can calm our mourning.

Ye Jesus speaks, and tells John to care for Mary as his mother.  He is no longer there to bind our sorrows, to heal our sick, to bring comfort to the grieving.  Instead, we must comfort one another, we must find the connecting principle that helps us become one.  In our afflictions, in the sorrow of our hearts, we come before Cross and realize how deeply we need each other.

Then Jesus says, "It is finished"; the Greek word "Τετέλεσται"/tetelestai, from the exact same verb teleios that meant, perfect, complete, and unconditional LOVE.  In dying, Jesus has made the connection of Love, and in that connection between heaven and earth, between god and human, between male and female, between all that is, we find Christ in the Midst of us.

The Atonement is made complete in Love.

We are One.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

A Maundy Thursday Liturgy

Thursday during Holy Week is called “Maundy Thursday”, yet the events of this day, and the teachings of Christ given during this time, are more celebrated, more important, and more profound than any other aspect of Christian doctrine.  Years ago, I had the chance to attend the evening Mass at Notre Dame in Paris on Maundy Thursday – it was an experience I will never forget.

This is the day of the Last Supper, where Christ instituted the Sacrament, the Holy Communion, the Eucharist.  Knowing that He was about to be crucified, Jesus taught his most important teachings to his disciples.  While it is true we recognize Christ’s birth, death, and resurrection as the three most common dates in Christ’s life, we often overlook that the Atonement’s pivotal events: the Sacrament, the Washing of Feet, the promise of the Comforter, the intercessory prayer of Atonement, and the suffering in the Garden of Gethsamane – all these events transpire on Thursday of Holy Week.

Yet there is one more event that names the day.  Jesus said:

John 13:34-35 “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

The words for “new commandment” in Latin are “Mandatum Novum”, and thus, the defining teaching of the day, that which makes the day “Maundy Thursday”, is a “New Commandment”, that we love one another *as* Jesus has loved us. 

Putting it into perspective, the terms “substitution”, “satisfaction”, “reconcile”, “punish”, or “ransom” do not appear in any of Christ’s teachings at the Last Supper, but the term “love” is mentioned thirty four times.

Love.

To be clear, the commandment to love is not new.  When asked what the Great commandment was, Jesus answered, “Hear oh Israel, The Lord our God is ONE, and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, might, mind and strength; and thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.  Upon these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”

Jesus also commanded us to be “perfect”/”teleios” in our love in the same way our Father in Heaven is “perfect” in His love.  This kind of perfection is not flawlessness as so many misinterpret.  It is to unconditionally love god and our neighbor, and that this love is the basis, essence, of all other commandments, laws, policies, guidelines, words of wisdom, and spiritual advice given in the Law (the Torah), and the Prophets (the writings of scripture).

So, the commandment to love is the very essence of all God wants us to do.  Love is the Great Commandment.  Love is the First Commandment. Love is the Second Commandment, and Love is the basis of all.  Yet today, this “Maundy Thursday”, Jesus gives us a “New Commandment” to love one another as he has loved us.  And given that this is now the last of Jesus’ teachings before he is to be crucified, we can consider it his Last Commandment in the flesh. 

So, then, how is this New Commandment in any way “new”?  Honestly, I don’t really know, and not knowing, I cannot hazard a guess.  Perhaps there is something that we can find in this that goes beyond the words.

So, in my mind, I enter the upper room as a disciple out of time.  I imagine myself walking into the room, the door closing behind me.  It’s a sacred space, the disciples gathered here are not just the apostles, but Mary Magdalene is here, Mary and Martha from Bethany, and Lazarus.  Jesus mother, Mary, is also here.  The air is filled with expectation, tinged with a bit of fear and sorrow.  I’m not sure what to think, the emotions of exultation on Sunday have become confused as the events of the week have gone on. 

A few moments ago, Jesus washed our feet, lowering himself as a slave.  It was awkward at first, Peter making such a scene, but after Jesus explained his meaning, I now understand so much more about who Jesus is, and what he expects of me.  I felt self-doubt as Jesus said that one of us will betray him, and for reasons I don’t really know, Judas Iscariot left the room.  Now, the air in the room as become filled with anticipation and…love.

And as the Spirit fills the room, Jesus stands in the glory of god, and gives us a new commandment, to love one another, as he has loved us.  Tears stream down my face, as I realize that my love, before now, has been directed toward the savior alone.  I have not loved myself – indeed, I hate myself, and I reflect that hate in how I project my fears and biases on others.  I have not loved others, because I am incapable of realizing any love for my sinful self.  Yet, I have not realized Jesus love for me is a gift, a package I have not yet opened.

A new commandment.  To love…AS HE has LOVED me.  In a moment, this moment, I realize the failings in my love for others occur because I fail to open the gift of Jesus’ love. 

In my tears, I look up and my eyes meet Jesus’ eyes.  His words pierce my soul: “Let not your heart be troubled; you have faith in God, have faith also in me.  Wither I go, you know, and the Way you know. 

Thomas speaks what my heart cries out, “How can we know the Way?”

Jesus answered, “I AM the Way, the Truth, and the Life.” 

Nine words.  All that Jesus taught us, encompassed in nine words.  I AM, JHWH, the very god of Israel, of all creation.  The Way – the very power of God expressed through the laws of nature and how we are to act in harmony with God.  Truth – knowledge of things as they are, as they were, and as they are to come.  Life – the essence of our rebirth in Christ, to have life in abundance. In these nine words, I realize the Christ in all that is, all that connects us to each other and to God.  The atonement becomes the abundant life made only possible by the connecting power of these words and events.  I am ONE!

Philip, realizing that behind Jesus’ words, he equated himself to god by invoking the sacred Name JHWH.  In reply, Jesus chides him gently as he explains the Atonement:

John 14:9-11 “Have I been so long time with you, and yet hast thou not known me, Philip? He that hath seen me hath seen the Father; and how sayest thou then, Shew us the Father?  Believest thou not that I am in the Father, and the Father in me? the words that I speak unto you I speak not of myself: but the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works. Believe me that I am in the Father, and the Father in me”

Jesus is One with God the Father.  No, Jesus is not a look-alike, as is so often portrayed in LDS art.  No, Jesus is not the incarnation of God the Father as is stated in the Book of Mormon.  Jesus is fully man, yet, in his realization of the God within him, he teaches Philip that God is not to be found “out there” as the “other”, but rather, as “in here”, One with us.  Immanuel is “God with Us”.  Jesus, Immanuel, marks the path and leads the Way, and every point defines to light, and life, and endless day, where God’s full presence shines. 

The room is now silent for a moment, as Jesus’ words, his teachings of the Oneness of God the Father, Himself, and now us, sink deeply into our souls. Something connects us – yes, this atonement is to be connected to the vine, to Jesus, to God, but the connecting power, the balm that heals, the grace that saves us…is Love. 

Breaking the silence, Jesus repeats, softly, “If ye love me, keep my commandments.”

My confusion begins to melt about his meaning.  I heard him say this so many times in my life.  Over and over again, “Keep the commandments!” “Follow the Prophet!”.  And in my despair, I asked, before, which commandments?  And the answer was always “all of them”, as I drilled myself into insanity trying to be perfect in my never-possible flawnessness, and falling short, indulging into a shame-filled orgy of self-hatred. 

My eyes, still connected with Jesus’ loving gaze, tear up again as I realize his words into the depths of my soul.  With saying anything out loud, his still, small voice pierces my heart: “Keep my commandment, my new commandment that I give unto you, that you love one another as I have loved you.  I love you, Mark, with all my heart, might, mind and strength, why can you not love yourself and our other brothers and sisters?  I am here for you, always.  I will not leave you comfortless, I will come unto you, yet again, and your heart will be joyful.”  I sob uncontrollably when his words, “I love you Mark” are spoken in my mother’s voice, the last words she spoke to me in this life.

Time pauses, as if the eternity and the now become One.

Jesus, turning to the disciples, says, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”  Then he explains the New Commandment: “As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love. If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love. These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full. *This is my commandment*, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

All my anguish, all the shame associated with trying to measure up to an endless list of commandments, melts away as Jesus explains what “Keep my commandments” actually means.  “This is my commandment” – this is IT…in case you need more clarity –“That ye love one another, as I have loved you.”

Jesus smiles as we realize the sublime simplicity of his commandments, the essence of the Gospel, and the entire meaning of the Atonement.  He speaks again, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. 14 Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.”  And if we weren’t clear on whatsoever he commands us, “These things I command you, that ye love one another.”

As my contemplative encounter in the upper room closes, I hear Jesus say in my mind, “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

Love Wins.